Letting Go

How hard is it for you to let go? For many of us it’s next to impossible.

Letting go comes up quite a bit in my life. It used to be when I went to an audition I would attach to the particular role I was going for and then when I didn’t book the job, I was upset. I had done everything I was supposed to do. Or at least I thought I had. I would lament for days about it. When I did this it was hard to bounce back from the disappointment.

And then I learned to not attach to the auditions. I go on a bunch. Half the time I can’t even tell you what they are for.  Some people might say this is the opposite thing to do if I want to manifest one of the jobs. But it’s not.

If I give it my all, become the part and leave it in the room, I still have a chance of not booking it because it is all contingent upon what others think. Maybe I look too young, too old, not grey, too thin, not thin enough, who the F^&K knows what they think when I leave the room. I only get attached, when I book it.

It took me a long time to let go of the way I was attaching to a certain outcome. The tighter I held, the harder it was to release it. We do this an awful lot to people. They are usually people who don’t serve us for the greatest good, unless of course you are into torturing yourself by learning the lesson of self worth ad nauseam.

Why is it so easy to put things that no longer serve us out on the curb for pick up, but giving up something with a soul is like pulling your nails out. Why do people lament so much over letting someone go? And is it really letting them go or maybe just maybe finally loving yourself enough to say you have had enough of the way they make you feel?

When do you draw the line and let go? At what point? What has to happen to you in order for you to honor yourself first, instead of gifting that away to someone who isn’t even honoring themselves? How could they be? If you love you, then that is what you eminnate. There’s no time for anything else because all that matters is being happy.

If someone wants to be in your life, they are there. It doesn’t matter what others think, it only matters what you do, of them. If someone wants to talk to you, they do. If someone is interested in what you have to say, they listen. If someone loves you, they honor and respect you and would never do anything consciously to hurt you. All of these qualities make a person happy. It’s the only thing that matters. Letting go becomes much easier when you remember this.

Because when we don’t let go, we harbor feelings that can eat away at us like pain, resentment, anger and frustration, which all lead to a complete feeling of disempowerment. If you are vibrating on this level, than chances are you have given all of your power away to someone or something else, allowing them to decide whether you feel good or not.

Why would you want to give your power away? Think of all of the great things you could do if you started putting yourself ahead of someone who isn’t doing the same for you.

Sometimes it hurts to let go, but we have to honor ourselves enough to know that the best outcome is one where we live from our heart, knowing we did the best we could.  If  someone cannot give you back what you gave to them, just know they are not in the same place.

Today I had to let go of a little blind kitten I had been fostering. I absolutely loved her! I was so torn about letting her go. A part of me felt sad that she will be back in a cage until she is adopted. I had asked that she be adopted out of my home but they declined. I try and be the voice for the animals I help, but there are others who have a voice as well and I must honor what they think is best and not force my will.

Fostering a blind kitten had its challenges. I had to keep her in one of my sons’ bedrooms away from the other animals and she kept him up some nights climbing his bed. I was very conscious of being away because I knew she was all alone, so I would cut things short. She required many feedings and medications and lots of litter changes, too. Her hearing was amazing and I felt so bad every time she heard one of the dogs bark, because it visibly freaked her out. I have the claw marks to prove it. Did I mention I am highly allergic to cats and am now trying to heal from a horrible chest cold?

While I would have loved to keep her, I knew that letting go was a better option for both of us. She deserves a home where she can run free without an 80 pound dog chasing her and I deserve to breathe. I know in letting go of Poppy she will be found by someone special because that is all she knows. She radiates joy and goodness and the person who discovers her will do the same.

So if I can let go of Poppy, knowing it is what is best for us both, who or what can you let go of?

If it doesn’t feel good to you, then it’s not good for you. There’s your gauge for letting go.

 

 

 

 

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Published by

Gretchen Allison

I'm literally a person who is a Jack of all trades, master of none. To date there has been barbering, cinematography, writing, fung shui and pretty much anything spiritual in nature. Next year I am going to learn how to ride a motorcycle! When I'm not trying new things I'm going to auditions, which I never tire of. I am blessed to have representation from some very wonderful agents and to be given the opportunity to do what I absolutely love. I am also a huge supporter of animals in need. I have fostered many cats and dogs through the years and still help out various rescues from time to time. I am also a new volunteer for WIN, NYC.

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