I’m obviously a fan of cooking! My company is called Eighty Sixed It; a common kitchen term used by chefs, and I created 4 decks based around food and people who deal with it.
It occurred to me that one of the reasons I am so drawn to this genre is that it is so incredibly relatable when it comes to life.
When you make a cake you need certain ingredients. If you make a cake without sugar, well, your cake is not going to taste very sweet. If you don’t cook it fully, then you’re cake is half-baked as they say.
Would you eat pasta right out of the box? I guess you could, but it wouldn’t taste so good. You need to follow the instructions on the package, like add a dash of salt to the water and make sure it is boiling.
If you are going all out and making something that takes an extreme amount of effort (like the chinese dumplings my son and I made), you gotta plan what you need ahead of time, because most likely you don’t have rice vinegar and all all of the rolling pins it requires to make the dumplings flat enough, and of course splits of prosecco to keep the chef happy (him not me).
When you think about relationships or work, it’s fascinating how similar creating a recipe and the other things that matter in life require the same ingredients in order for it to be digestible. Every chef must contribute their specialty in order for the meal to come together. If one chef is slacking, the meal will die on the pass (go to shit).
In cooking if we put too much salt in, the meal will taste horrible. Not enough and our meal is tasteless. The same can be said about butter. Is there ever too much butter? The answer is no.
So if we think about life in accordance with recipes, we would ask the following. Are you giving too much to something? Putting in all of the effort, adding this, tweaking that and still feeling like you are coming up short? Is what you are giving all of this effort to giving you something in return?
Most of us will probably feel as though we are master chefs, like Gordon Ramsey (without the yelling); giving all of our time and attention to shoemakers (A derogotory term for cooks who burn everything) and that they have shown us that they are incapable of cutting the mustard, let alone adding anything to our recipe.
This was my aha moment over the past week. Thanks to my brother in-law Eric for pointing this out to me when I asked his advice on my acting career. (I recently had the pleasure of slipping away with him and my fabulous sister for a long weekend).
His words: “Stop caring! Care less!”
I translated this to give less. If I see someone or an opportunity meeting me at the same level of the energy which I am giving, then I will give more. But until someone or something is bringing an ingredient to add to my recipe, they get only the recipe and nothing more.
They don’t get the extras! The way I add the little bits of this and that. The way I tweak something to make it more special. And they certainly don’t get my recipe card with all of the special notes, because I like to keep those close.
People are only capable of giving you what they feel worthy of themselves. You will never change anyone. Ever! They aren’t ever going to be able to give you the truffle salt, when all they know is Mortons.
You are the truffle salt! So stop giving to Mortons! There is no need to keep shopping in a deli, when you have elevated yourself vibrationally to a Balduccis.
Let people meet you at your energetic level. Do not keep lowering your vibration and ruining your recipe, by meeting people at theirs. You are perfectly perfect just the way you are, so why ruin what you have worked so hard to create, by sharing it with people who can’t even begin to understand all of the effort you have put in.
Keep cookin! Just don’t share your fabulous meals with people who don’t even understand your ingredients.