As you travel along in life and meet people on your journey, your relationship with them will have a great deal to do with your past experiences. So you will either have healthy relationships with people or unhealthy ones, depending on how much you reflect on why things have not worked out for you in the past.
There are those who will try and conquer the sadness and heartache by getting back out there as soon as they can without a moment to reflect. This is a person who needs to fill a void in their life. They can’t be alone. People who can’t be alone attract other people who can’t be alone and its the perfect cocktail for co-dependence. If that’s your bag, that’s your bag. Eventually that bag will get too heavy to carry and you’ll have to face yourself, but until that happens, enjoy all that baggage.
Others of us will fend off men or women for the rest of our lives. We might become hermit-ish or monk-like, reading books all the time and being perfectly content with not talking to anyone.
Then there’s the star. The one who shines brightly despite all of the battles they have endured. They have lived through some real tough lessons, know their worth and are willing to give someone else a chance, but they aren’t going to actively pursue any avenues to make it happen. They just know it will.
Some of us will throw ourselves into work. We will take on extra projects, maybe even pick up a second job and only associate with people we work with. We make sure we are so busy making coin, we don’t have any time to enjoy it. We just keep saving for a future, but we don’t give ourselves the opportunity to even think about it.
Then there’s the track star. This is the person who has been wounded so deeply, whenever they meet someone they like, they run as fast as they can the other way. If you say that out loud it sounds utterly insane. “I like this person, so I am going to run away from them.” I personally can’t imagine doing this even after all of the garbage I have been through, but to each his own.
I’m a person who likes to reflect. Not on why a relationship didn’t work, but how I attracted it in the first place. There’s a lot of digging that goes on with this, but once you get to the bottom of the pit, you hit gold and can start to rebuild yourself and come back stronger.
You won’t find me on the dating websites. It’s not my style. I’m too busy with work, raising my son and being a good mother to my other two to give a website other than my own any attention. I’m perfectly fine being somewhere between the hermit and the star. I don’t mind being alone, but every now and then I like having all of the attention, which is why I act.
I can essentially give myself anything someone else could give me, so unless someone is bringing more to the table than a fork, I’m gonna eat alone or with my son and the cast of whatever production I am on.
Wherever you are at on your journey will have everything to do with your past. Have you handed over your future because of your pain or have you reflected on why things happened and made room for new love to come in?
If you’re the track star, then you need to ask yourself, what is it you are really running from because if it is love that you seek, eventually you’ll turn around and see that you are the only one in the race.