Have No Fear

Fear: dread, fright, alarm, panic, terror, trepidation. It implies anxiety and usually loss of courage.

Fear weakens our immune system and can cause cardiovascular damage, gastrointestinal problems such as ulcers and irritable bowel syndrome. It can lead to accelerated ageing and even premature death. It is a constricting energy.

Love can be maternal/paternal, affection felt by two people who have a romantic relationship. Love is consistently linked to lower levels of stress. Love improves your mood and makes you feel expansive.

So knowing this, it only makes sense to love more and fear less, doesn’t it?

But, sadly, there are people in the world who are incapable of love. This is because they live in fear. They fear being vulnerable. As a child they may have experienced rejection when they showed this quality, so they learned to mask this so they wouldn’t get hurt.

In order to mask vulnerability you have to master control, but control cannot exist with love. People who do this may get a taste of love from another, but they will essentially wind up rejecting it on some level. This is because they have never really known love, so when it shows up, they don’t trust it.

It seems utterly insane doesn’t it? To reject the very thing most of us want and need in our lives.

If you are going into a relationship thinking the other shoe is going to drop at some point because a person might see the real you and run the other way, then you aren’t being authentic. You have essentially put up a false front of who you really are, which is a relationship built on deception.

When a partner feels like there is a barrier between them and the one they love, the relationship is going to take a hit. They might try and communicate their feelings to try and fix this and in a normal, loving relationship their partner will understand and take steps to mend this gap. But if you are with a person who lives in fear, which means they try and control everything, they will see your communication as an argument.

As you can imagine, you won’t feel loved at all; you will feel rejected. This is because people who are incapable of love don’t love themselves. Without that, they can’t possibly love another person or even know how to experience love if they haven’t learned to love who they are first. You cannot maintain a loving relationship with someone like this because love is impossible for them.

There is no need to fear love. Love is what we all need in our lives. It really is essential. But if you are a person who hasn’t done the work to heal this core wound inside of you, when the right love comes along that uplifts you, stands by you, supports you, helps you grow, makes you reach new heights, believes in you, has your backs when no one else does and just a smile from them catapults you into higher levels, you will reject their love because your control won’t allow them fully in.

This fear based person will stay stuck in a loop of negativity and blame others for the lack of love they experience in their lives. And if they lose someone who once loved them, they will blame them for leaving, instead of taking accountability for their lack of showing that person love.

But the person who understands that fear can never be the basis of a relationship and that the love we seek outside of ourselves can only be found within first, is the person who lives a more fulfilled life.

Love conquers fear. So if you are a person who lives in fear, just know that you can experience love at any time, it just requires you to be vulnerable. But for some, control is a whole lot easier. Loneliner, but easier.

Published by

gretchenlynnallison

I am an actress, model, writer and creator of inspirational card decks I sell on Amazon. I also love animals and spend a great deal of time working as a volunteer with several organizations.

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