Proving Others Wrong

When you’re underestimated and people don’t believe in what you’re doing, proving them wrong can be an incredible motivator.

But in order to feel such an inner driver, we first have to believe in ourselves so strongly, and be so committed to achieving our goals, that we are willing to make changes and take opportunities that pull us out of our comfort zone.

Absolutely no one can prove anyone wrong, if they continue to play small. The people who prove people wrong, are the ones who play it even bigger than what they could have imagined.

I recently worked with a young woman on a project who had submitted herself for a co-starring role in a movie. She said she didn’t feel that she was qualified enough to play a starring role, so she was shocked to learn that her agent had submitted her for the same project, but for the lead. She didn’t book the co-star role. She did in fact book the lead.

Her story reminded me of just how often we see ourselves in one way and others see us in another. If we are holding any wounds from our past, we may not only be passing up really good roles, we may also be passing on some really amazing relationships, simply because we don’t feel worthy of them.

So while we might think we need to prove others wrong, perhaps the person we are really needing to prove wrong, is ourselves.

What Qualifies Our Identity

When people ask you what you do for a living and you answer, at what point did you feel that you were qualified to identify with it? Did you reach some expert status, certain accolade, a financial level?

I didn’t call myself an actor for a long time. I would say I did acting, but never felt qualified to claim the title. I was always in awe of people I took classes with or who had done the same amount as work as me, who did. It wasn’t until I did a number of jobs that I felt qualified to call myself one.

And while some of us may struggle with identifying as something, there are people who identify with titles and roles who aren’t qualified at all. They just pretend they are or they are so delusional, they actually think they are.

Have you ever talked to someone who brags about how well they are doing, but you know it isn’t true? They try very hard to identify with being happy, but people who are happy don’t need to tell you they are happy; you see it, feel it and experience their joy when you are with them.

We may identify with qualities we admire in others, but if we haven’t done the work ourselves to obtain these things, then no matter how much we say we are that, we really aren’t, and it shows.

What we identify with and the quality in which we give to it or get from it, is very telling about what matters most to us. Are your relationships healthy? Are they loving? Are they kind? Are they giving? Are they fulfilling? Is work just work, a measure of your ego or do you actually enjoy it?

What do you identify with? And is it bringing you the quality of life you want? Cause if it’s not, you really need to think about what matters most. And what matters most, is love.

Love should be your inner driver towards everything. When everything is done from a place of love, the quality of your life only ever identifies with anything and anyone who operates from the same space. You attract jobs, people and situations that are only in your best interest.

Life is not hard. Keeping up a false identity is. And operating from a place of non-love not only makes your life harder, it is unsustainable. Look at your relationships for proof.