Feelings

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an emotional state or reaction.

Do You Love What You Feel

We all have feelings, but some of us don’t quite know how to express them. This is really hard for people who feel everything, to understand. It requires patience when dealing with someone who does not share. But patience is a virtue, which is why so many of us aren’t virtuous.

A person who has a hard time with their feelings will tell you that you need to have patience with them. How much patience are we talking about? Well, I don’t know about you, but I don’t have patience because I see patience as an excuse for someone who doesn’t like change.

What is it about change that frightens so many people? The unknown, if you will. I love it! I live it! I breathe it! If I’m not changing, I’m stagnant and crippled with anxiety, worrying about a future that has yet to happen. Or I’m still living in the past, basing all of the decisions and actions I take, based on what happened there.

I didn’t coin it, but it’s true. “The only thing that is constant is change,” so why not embrace it?

Part of changing, is acknowledging our feelings. Maybe even about change. When we trap our feelings inside and don’t share them, they fester until eventually (who knows when and where) they erupt. Usually people will look at you like you’re some kind of a lunatic, because they have no clue how long you have been holding all that stuff in.

I don’t know why people still hold feelings in, especially when we live in a time that is completely unpredictable and seems to be no rhyme or reason as why you would want to. You can only blame your upbringing for so long on this one.

I was told to keep the peace for years, but honestly, I stopped doing that a long time ago. The only people that served, were the people who asked it of me and I don’t answer to them anymore.

I would rather be around people who yell and show passion then people who storm off, say nothing, act like nothing is wrong when you know it is, or don’t talk to you at all. This behavior is a complete and utter breakdown in communication and makes the people in your life feel like you don’t give a crap what they think.

Passion. It is the key to everything. It’s what drives us to want things. It ignites a fire inside of us that spurns us on. It builds character, makes us act spontaneous and is fully accountable as the catalyst to go after our dreams.

People without passion…I just don’t get em. How do you live without it? How do you not allow yourself to feel this fire?

I guess it all goes back to that ugly word, control. When we don’t share our feelings with someone, we are trying a situation or them. But this is an illusion. Control is an illusion. You cannot control anyone, so why would you want to control yourself from feeling passion?

Feelings equals vulnerability and if you aren’t brave enough, passionate enough or confident enough to share them, than it’s probably best that you go live in a cave somewhere, so people who feel, don’t mistake you for someone who does.

People who feel understand that taking chances, going for their dreams and sharing their feelings is what they came here to do. It’s what we all came her for. To be who we are without all of the programs and control.

All that is required to do this, is to be authentic. To accept that you are a person who is worthy of love, understanding and kindness, but in order to have those things, you have to feel. You have to let people in.

Feel something! Anything! What’s the worst that can happen, if you do?

 

Communication

The imparting or exchanging of information or news.

Means of connection between people or places, in particular.

It’s amazing how “off” communication can be between people. If I had to guess, I would say that most relationships fail because of a lack of it.  Every now and then there could be a failure due to one of you being too much of a gabber, but there’s always ear plugs for that.

Why is it when someone asks you, “What’s wrong?”  You answer, “Nothing.” When in reality you could write an epic novel about what is bothering you.

But why don’t you just come out and say it? Why don’t people communicate more? It really is a lost art!

When you text or email it often does not come across the way you had hoped. Why has writing letters gone by the wayside?  Is it because it’s too hard? Are we really that lazy? Or is it because we have forgotten how to connect with people? I mean really connect? Like soul to soul.

Maybe you think about having a chat with someone to get to know them better but then you think too much about what to say and wind up saying nothing at all. How’s that working for you? Probably not so good, cause when you say nothing, it ironically says a whole lot more.  Silence is not golden, it’s crushing.

If I had to guess why so many of us are so hesitant to express ourselves, I would say it’s out of fear. We are afraid of what someone will think of what we have to say. What most of us are really afraid of though, is rejection.

Not me! I’ve got rejection down. Rejection and I are sympatico. I don’t fear it at all. I go out on a limb, the limb breaks and I get back up. I don’t just get back up, I get busy.  Nothing spurns me on more than rejection. I re-focus, redirect, reinvent myself and get back to work.

But I didn’t always do that. For years I lived under the auspice called, “Keep the peace” where I wasn’t allowed to express myself at all. If I did, it made life tough on my parents who were both newly married to partners with their own children. I was not so keen on any Brady Bunchesque situation, but out of my love for them I swallowed a lot of crap. I am grateful that I no longer have to pay homage to that archaic contract.

It took me many years and much heartache to learn that love should never involve keeping the peace. Real love is unconditional, meaning it doesn’t matter what is said because there are no conditions or limitations when you really love someone, there’s only acceptance of all that they are.