I don’t know when your day starts, but mine does around 5am. I feel like I live on a farm! I always said I wanted to have a farm with dogs I adopted because there is a lot of space there, but in a house it’s a bit much.
I currently have a resident who came from Mississippi. A dumpster dog as he is so lovingly called. I think it’s a horrible term and probably has something to do with his personality. He eats cans, bricks, stones, plastic, whatever he can get his teeth on. Yesterday he ate a book cover. I guess he didn’t like me reading The 48 Laws of Power. Perhaps he thought the intel would not bode well for him.
He is my oldest son’s dog and since I talked my oldest into staying for the summer instead of going back to UConn, Beau stays with him. Actually Beau stays with me most of the time because we all know that a kid having a dog generally means the parent watches it.
This charmer has a thing with ambulances. The town I live in loves an ambulance! Beau either hates them or is calling to them because he howls at the top of his lungs at them. My other dog, Archie, a ridiculously anxiety-ridden dog will bark too when he howls. The cat, Milo simply looks at the two of them like they are mental because cats are superior and Milo is superior to everyone.
I wake at 5 because I go to bed at 8:30. I’m not usually asleep, I just shut the door to my bedroom and sprawl across my king size bed, grateful for the alone time. Actually I’m not alone. The two dogs and cat seem to be grateful for the respite as well.
Yesterday, as I lie there, unwinding from cooking meals and doing laundry for three kids and cleaning a house because my oldest is having his girlfriend this weekend, there was a knock on my door. It was my oldest holding his computer.
“Hey, Mom! Do you think you can listen to my podcast?” “I would love to!” I love it when he shares his work with me. It’s very good and I tell him so. “I’m going to go out with some friends for a bit. Love you! Sleep well!” He says, and shuts my door.
Sleep! Glorious sleep. I had forgotten why I came in here. I turn off my light and I hear a knock on the door. “Come on in!” I say. It’s my youngest.
“Mom, Can I talk to you about something?” “Of course!” He talked to me about football (which I know nothing about) but wanted to show me a kid who transferred schools and was all pro now. This is something he talks about doing. I’m on board. I’ve got less than two years with him and if my baby wants me to move to the moon, I will, just so he can have an opportunity to obtain his dream. He left feeling confident, so I turned out my light again.
They say the third time is a charm. Low and behold! The charm arrived via my middle son.
“Hey, Ma! Do you know the passcode for Netflix?” I hate passcodes! When did our world become so complicated? I didn’t know the passcode, but he stayed for a bit and we chatted about relationships. Why people settle; his theory on that then mine. He taught me a few phrases in Mandarin which I have since forgotten, asked if he could order some food and said, “Xiexie mama,” then, “Why are you in bed so early?”
Early? Because I get up at the crack of dawn! I walk for 45 minutes while the rest of the world sleeps, I clean a cat box, walk two dogs, feed them all, feed the birds, clean up messes left in the kitchen from the night prior, pack orders for my company, make a five course meal for my youngest before he heads to Jersey City for the day, write a blog, make Instagram posts, read emails and do any auditions I have been sent. I also went back to working in a salon on Fridays so I spend a but of time watching videos on the latest color techniques, all before my little darlings rise from their peaceful slumber.
It’s not easy being a mom but my children are my first priority. Because of this commitment, I have made choices that do not benefit me in the least, but my relationship with them is of the unconditional kind, so I forego a lot of me time for them time.
My kids have big dreams, but so do I. I would not be able to support them the way that I do if I didn’t understand their drive. This inner knowing of what is best for you and what is not is something I have always tried to instill in them. Sometimes we make choices that we know aren’t going to serve us in the long run, so we have to be brave enough to make different ones, even when others might disagree.
Life is always changing and if you aren’t willing to change with it, your chances of being a success are slim to none. Change can be overwhelming for people, but in this house, change is the name of the game. It can be exhausting and frankly, just too much at times, but when you have lofty goals, there’s no such thing as sitting idle.
So when the end of the day comes, it’s all I want to do! I’ve earned it. I slip away down the hall and climb into my big bed with big thread count sheets and breathe a sigh of relief. Until there is a knock on the door and Lucy is back at her station, doling out advice and giving pep talks.
And to be honest, I love every minute of it.